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Andy Rooney talks to God

I am no big fan of Andy Rooney. To me he is a whiney fart with obvious problems seeing the good things in life. Of course that impression is based on his appearances in CBS 60 Minutes.

Recently Andy has received a lot of press on a few sarcastic comments he made on his weekly appearance, about people using God's word for their own purposes. I am not a religious person, hence I find this uproaringly... ...funny.

I heard from God just the other night. God always seems to call at night. "Andrew," God said to me. He always calls me "Andrew." I like that. "Andrew, you have the eyes and ears of a lot of people. I wish you'd tell your viewers that both Pat Robertson and Mel Gibson strike me as wackos. I believe that's one of your current words. They're crazy as bedbugs, another earthly expression. I created bedbugs. I'll tell you, they're no crazier than people, said God. "Let me just say that I think I'd remember if I'd ever talked to Pat Robertson, and I'd remember if I said Bush would get re-elected in a blowout." As far as Mel Gibson goes, I haven't seen his movie, 'The Passion of the Christ,' because it hasn't opened up here yet. But I did catch Gibson being interviewed by Diane Sawyer. I did something right when I came up with her, didn't I, added God. Anyway, as I was saying, Mel is a real nut case. What in the world was I thinking when I created him? Listen, we all make mistakes."

Funny? You bet. It gets even more funny reading stories about what Andy Rooney said. Like this one, where Andy's final question to Mel about how much money he makes off the crucifixion of Christ in a way gets confirmation. Check out the not so subtle commercial message from the Editor at the end of the article.

CBS News | As God Told Me ... | February 26, 2004 11:58:24

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